Other than the Word Count shows, there have been very little in the way of blogs lately. I’m sure there’s a bit of procrastination involved in the reason of “why not,” but it’s more than that.
To be honest, until this week, I haven’t done much by way of writing—let alone blogging—and my issue isn’t so much time.
God knows I’ve been extraordinarily busy. The consulting Program Manager life isn’t for the faint of heart—you’re responsible for everything but have the authority to change nothing. Yet you still have to deliver.
I love that challenge, by the way. Don’t let me ever tell you otherwise.
There. I’m doing it again. Procrastinating. And avoiding.
See, I’m struggling a bit and I’m not the type of guy who normally asks for help. One of the reasons I went “indie” is control. I can write and publish what I want. I can pick an editor I love (yes—as an indie you NEED an editor. See the bazillion posts on that particular issue all over the internet. It’s second only to cat videos). I can choose the cover artist I like. I can publish when I want in the format of my choice.
But I hit a problem a couple years ago. A famous author started to bring out books of her own with the same series name as mine. And by “bring out” I mean be published by one of the big publishing houses.
I tried to trademark my series name after the fact. No dice.
I tried to write to her, her agent and her publishing house. Close your eyes and you’ll see the number of responses I received.
But…no one has tried to send me a cease and desist order either. Small blessings.
I’ll be changing the name of the series—probably whenever I get book two done. But this entire situation and the walk through of this tough patch was done mostly alone. Because I’m a…you know…”indie.”
I typed earlier that I’m not one to ask for help. That’s kinda of a critical flaw when it comes to being an indie writer. I have NO issue asking for help in the Program Management life I lead by day.
But in my “writer life,” it’s an issue.
I tried a small press once—not the best of business experiences for me.
There certainly are other small presses out there. Booktrope has an interesting model and I like the folks who work there. Ragnarok Publications looks really awesome too—and they signed Mercedes M. Yardley who is a terrific writer, mom and all-around good person (and she has a stuffed dragon I’m gonna steal someday).
I just submitted a short story to Grey Matter Press—who also seem pretty awesome.
I know, I know. I’m wandering a bit. We are coming close to my struggle here. It’s my blog, my therapy session. Stay with me.
…but I don’t have the right temperment…!
See, I need more structure to my writing. I need somebody who ‘gets’ what I’m trying to do and will work with me to make me a better writer—and a better storyteller.
I need someone to be blown away when I write something awesome. I need them to kick me in the nuts when I don’t.
The writing groups and individuals I’ve met in this industry over the years provide bits and pieces. Some good advice, some bad. A lot of folks hawking their own books. And lots and lots of noise.
This, more than anything else, is what I’ve learned being an Indie writer. I’ve learned what I need to do better. I’ve learned what I can’t do on my own. I’ve learned what I need to better the story.
I need a mentor, a confidant, a fan, an editor, a publicist and the crazy nun/penguin from The Blues Brothers.
Okay. Maybe not the penguin.
In short, I think I might need to find a publisher.
“For reals,” (as my daughter says).